My favorite thing to overhear at work

Don't bother giving this to the editors; I KNOW it's right. 

Okie doke! Good luck, to you!

It's nice being so busy and yet so unnecessary each day. :)

What fresh hell is this?

The items that actually make it through R&D and onto the shelf astound me.

Frozen blackberry wine "cocktail". Also known as the Hangover in a Pouch.
Hey Arbor Mist! Real wine called. It wants its reputation back.

When I think of the chemical compounds that went into making this "softer, chewier" Rainbow Nerds Rope,
I worry about the fact that I even touched the outer packaging.

I might be in the minority on this one. But yuck. I believe everyone should have the right to marry
EXCEPT chocolate and raspberry. Surely this is what evil must taste like.

Cracked-out dreams

Perhaps it's been a little warm in my house lately, because my dreams have gotten weird.

Like the one I had where we were all forced to wear swimsuits and funny socks to a company meeting.

That seemed like an odd one until their royal heinousess (I spelled it that way on purpose) William and Kate decided to renew their vows... In my old high school gymnasium.

Maybe it's time to turn a fan on in my room.

Chuckleworthy compliment (I think)

I went to dinner with Beau last week. The waiter IDed me. He looked at my ID, looked at me, and said:

"You... Are doing VERY WELL!"

;)

At the Texas Roadhouse...

You must wear shoes.
You must wear a shirt.

But, evidently, chewing with your mouth closed is 100% optional.

Nobody will care about this but me...

But it's my blog, so HAH!

Last night I bowled 175 INCLUDING FOUR STRIKES IN A ROW (which, my friend Jen informs me, is a Wild Turkey!).

Happy happy joy joy!

I don't care if it's all natural

I still don't want it.

Yuck.

Though I think it would be a funny substitute for lemonade to refresh someone you don't like.

New level of denial discovered

A couple of Beau's friends became grandparents recently.

When he talked to them on the phone, he asked the woman what it felt like to be a grandma.

Oh, I'm NOT a grandma, she replied. I'm a GLAM-ma.

Bless her heart.

What do YOU wear to buy mulch?

If you're like this lady, you wear a faux mink coat (with a hood, because that's what makes it classy), plaid Bermuda shorts, running shoes, and a purse worth more than my car.

A little advice for the fellas when you'e chattin' up the ladies

Don't tell us you have big balls.

Women don't care about that kind of stuff and when you mention it, the inevitable mental image presents itself.

Not good.

Also, don't repeatedly touch and/or talk about your nipples in casual conversations.

We tend to see that as a red flag too.

Happy to help!!