Recently, I accompanied one of my friends out to meet with a bunch of her old high school buddies.
They were all really nice folks.
But one guy... (there's always one).
He bragged about a lot of odd things.
One of which was the fact that he'd been in a lot of bar fights.
He went into lots of detail about each one until I finally stopped him and said This really isn't something to brag about.
So he stopped.
But what he didn't stop was drinking. He pounded beer after beer after beer. When I asked him Don't you have to drive home? He launched into the "system" speech.
He calculates time spent drinking with his (considerable) body mass and the number of drinks.
Works every time, he said. I've been pulled over and arrested twice, and both times they've had to let me go because I blew under the limit.
So, when he got pulled over TWICE for erratic driving under the influence and got off on a loophole, he declared a victory.
His idea of a victory and mine are vastly different.
When I mentioned that, he asked me what my system was.
I don't drink enough to have to calculate all of that when I know I'm going to drive.
That got a pathetic head shake.
Fancy, I know.
He lives on the north side of town, folks. Buckle up.
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