Oh, Cosmo

As I stood in line at Target, I glanced at the magazine covers.

When I got to Cosmopolitan, I had to chuckle. The magazine is geared to women in their teens and 20s, and there are always at least three headlines about how to please a man in bed. It's always been that way. It'll always be that way.

Blow his mind!
Keep him coming back for more!
The one move that will take him to the brink of death!

Whatever.

But what they don't tell these dear readers is that fellas (especially fellas in their teens and 20s) are pretty thrilled if you simply show up and are a willing participant.

For a lot of them, that's a mind-blower right there.

Also, there's a reason the positions in that mag are demonstrated by drawings. Real people who are not contortionists by trade can't get into those positions. Even if they can, once they're there, there's little pleasure to be derived. 

And the fellas who demand to be impressed by porn-star maneuvers probably aren't the ones you need to be with anyway.

But go ahead, Cosmo. Keep "informing" the youth of America and keep on amusing the rest of us. What else are we going to do in the checkout line?