Ah, the office.

Every office has those personalities that make your day better (and those that don’t). Here’s a list of some of the super-duper personalities at my office.

• The Cheese-Grater Voice: This woman shrieks every inanity that comes into her mind. Let me tell you why I don’t like Romaine lettuce anymore! Dogs are nice! How am I going to make it to spin class on time? Or, my personal favorite: TUNA!! If she ever leaves the company, she’s got a future in peeling paint off of walls with that voice.
• The Stomper: This fella buys all of his shoes based on the decibels they put out when he walks down the hall. If he’s upset about anything, you know about it a good 15 seconds before he arrives.
• The Munchausen Woman: If she has a new ailment or new food allergy, you hear about it. You hear ALL about it. You get updates every day. You don’t know much about her personal life, but you do know whether she’s pooped or not on any given day. And it’s then that you realize you’re witnessing the genesis of that old woman who tells complete strangers about the corns on her feet. 
• Supply-Cabinet Marauder: Dude, how many staplers do you need?
• The Fish Microwaver: She is possibly the most heinous office offender. This person coldheartedly funkifies the entire office with the reek of reheated fish and runs to hide (though, let’s be honest, she’s not hard to find—just follow the stench).
• The Every-Day’s-a-Musical Guy:  He always makes my day better. Even when there’s a problem, he manages to sing it for me. 
• The Whistler: The Andy Griffith Show theme song is going through your head? Thaaaaaanks for whistling it. Now it’s going through my head too.
• The Farter: Enough said.