I did a little holiday shopping over the weekend (I did very little holiday buying; the very worst of 80s fashions are back. Puffy sleeves, extreme ruching, pink and teal satin with black-lace overlay--all in one outfit! And I could swear I saw a hint of acid-wash).
The one thing that was ubiquitous was really shitty Christmas music.
Do we need a reggae version of Joy to the World? Why must Manheim Steamroller crash through each holiday classic like Godzilla on a three-day bender? I also love the somewhat disturbing R&B versions; why not get a little sticky, sweet, and sweaty this holiday season? (Baby, you know it's Christmas.... awwwww yeah. You know what I want under that tree. Awwwww yeah. Tied up with a big red bow. Just waitin' for me. Awwwwww yeah.)
And don't even get me started on the ear-bloodying tones of Miss Jessica Simpson. I have a sneaking suspicion that she has a deal with any department store that carries her "shoes", "jeans", "jewelry", or "purses". You carry her lines? Her bubble-gum encrusted holiday tunes get heavy rotation. (Side note: I dare anybody to wear the Jessica Simpson line without looking like a hooker. I really don't think it's possible.)
I guess I'm just a sucker for the classics. The Rat Pack, the Charlie Brown Christmas album (totally worth it if you don't have it), and the Johnny Mathis Christmas album. They're all golden in my book.
But I do have a guilty pleasure or two (as anybody who grew up in the 80s does)...
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